Do you know that people make bombs that look like ipods?

February 20, 2012

So here I am ranting about the ugly American and I was one of them last night. In an effort to save a few Euros (and not pay $5 for a bottle of water), I ordered tap water at dinner. I went to the bathroom and when I returned a tiny, overpriced bottle of Vittel water was waiting for me at the table. My first instinct, "I'm not paying for this." I asked the waiter for tap water instead and in an awkward exchange that I can only assume meant, "Tough cookies. I already brought the water to the table so you're paying for it.", the water ended up staying put. And costing me 4 Euros. France 1. Elizabeth 0. I guess the idea of having endless pitchers of ice water brought to your table Chili's style is a very American ideal. C'est la vie.

I hate to admit it, but I was also a rather ugly American this morning while I was checking in for my flight. I only planned to carry on, but the self-check kiosk were roped in on all sides. Not wanting to wait in line behind the whole French women's water polo team, I did what any impatient American would do, I went under the rope. Or attempted to. I would have made it free and clear had my backpack not caught the rope and sent it reeling back with a very loud snap. The airline agent, who I'm sure will be complaining about me later at the water cooler, scolded me and sent me to the back of the line. After answering a ridiculous amount of security questions (How long have you owned your ipod? Are you sure it's not a bomb? You have nail clippers? (Is she allowed to have nail clippers?) Do you know that people make bombs that look like ipods?), I ended up checking my bag anyway. American Airlines got their payback after subjecting my fellow passengers and I to perhaps the most ridiculous boarding procedure I have ever encountered. Over an hour and three modes of transportation to actually get to the plane later, I was on board. But Paris redeemed herself yet again with a spectacular view of the city and the Eiffel Tower as we made our way west toward the Atlantic. Paris wins again.

When did flying lose its magic?

After the rather spectacular panoramic view of Paris subsided, I expected the young teenage girl in the seat next to me to settle in to her book, but she kept leaning over me to look out the window. When she saw that I'd committed to the inflight movie, she asked me if I wanted to switch seats. She spent the next few hours staring out the window into the vast blue of the Atlantic ocean. Remember when getting the window seat on the plane as a kid was a big deal? I mean a really big deal. You felt like you could see the whole world out your little 8 1/2 x 11 window. You saw the amazing landscape that we, as Americans, often take for granted...the snow capped mountains, crystal blue lakes, and plains laid out like a green patchwork quilt. And what about all of the other great things about flying? you have nice people that bring you juice and tiny pretzels and a tray of food where, as a kid, everything is just your size. You have this big, comfy seat all to yourself. And you don't have that pesky adult problem where a person who might need more than their fair share of a seat is slowly squeezing you out of yours because you're small yourself. And no pesky siblings fighting you for the remote or annoying parents asking you to turn down the volume because you plug in your headphones and the inflight entertainment is all yours not to mention eight radio stations plus the random channel where you get to hear all of the action that's going on up in the cockpit. What's not to like? And don't forget about the bathroom. Kids are the only ones who can comfortably fit inside. So the next time you're shoehorned into an airplane seat with a seat back reclined within seven inches of your face and starving because all you've eaten for the day is four tiny pretzels, try looking at it through the eyes of a child. and then next time, fly first class.

A stamp in your passport...

I almost made it in and out of the country without a passport stamp. Had I not asked the rather surly woman in France, I would not have received a stamp and would have no evidence of my trip.

The best show you could get for 4 Euros...

February 19, 2012

Things I love about Paris today...
-Versailles in all its glory. The lines not so much.
-Cimetiere du Pere Lachaise. This is where Jim Morrison is actually buried. Amazing to see so many paying their respects to a main whose music touched them over 40 years ago.
-Impromptu Carnaval parade. Mardi Gras Paris style. No beads (or boobs) required.
-The Eiffel Tower. We got there around dusk and saw the tower in a beautiful blue dusky sky. In a word: amazing. We walked to the second deck (the top was closed) and arrived just in time to see the light show that goes off every hour. I lay down on the observation deck for an amazing view. Best show you could get for 4 Euros. I also lay down at the bottom directly in the center for another exciting view. It was a perfect end to the trip. :)
-The intoxicated man on the metro offering us his beer.
-Holding strong on our crepe a day rule.

Sometimes I pretend I'm from Canada...

February 18, 2012

Things I love about Paris today...
-Tiny coffees (Are Americans really over caffeinated or over-supersized?)
-Macaroons! (Not like the ones for Passover.)
-Having an entire exchange at the bakery in French! I attempted this yesterday and almost succeeded until the cashier said "Have a nice day.")
-Saint Chapelle. Everything about it is amazing.
-The view from the top of Notre Dame. The stairs to get there...not so much. I feel the need to watch the Disney movie now.
-A perfectly Parisian moment...Walking across the Pont au Change and there was a man playing an accordion, a lovely French song, and a view of Notre Dame in the background. Perfectly Paris.
-An impromptu French concert/sing along in Luxembourg Gardens. A few musicians were playing and brought along song books for the crowd. Passers by joined in the festivities. It was all very lovely. French music just sounds so happy. The gardens in general were lovely. Next time I come, I'm renting a small toy boat to sail in the fountain.
-The Eiffel Tower at night.

Reaching the top of the stairs to the upper chapel in Saint Chapelle and getting a peek at the stained glass quite literally took my breath away. I said a very meaningful, "Holy..." but luckily I caught myself before I finished it off with a word you shouldn't say in church. Pictures (and words) just don't do it justice.

"Sometimes I pretend I'm from Canada..." We had dinner at a cafe off the Pont Neuf while waiting for our boat cruise. The couple to the right were British, the table to the far left was a group of obnoxiously loud American college students with gallon sized glasses of beer (Hello! We're in France. Order wine.), and the family that sat down to our left was an American couple with two small children, one with an obnoxious video game with the Mario Kart on full blast. The only person I heard speaking French was the waiter. It was disappointed to say the least. Our Seine River cruise came highly recommended and we were looking forward to seeing the sights at night. Until we realized that even more loud, obnoxious Americans were using this as a booze cruise. We heard very little that the tour guide said and after sinking into our chairs out of sheer embarrassment at even sharing a continent with these people, I got up and asked them to keep it down. I don't know if I could have lived with myself if I didn't. The family in front of me thanked me in Spanish. My response? "I apologize on behalf of America." I know you can't necessarily teach cultural competence in a classroom, but as a nation we have to figure something out before the rest of the world thinks we're nothing more than an extension of the cast of Jersey Shore.

Art History for Dummies

February 17, 2012

Things I love about Paris:
-How people walk down the street eating baguettes like candy bars
-How at an outdoor table for two, both chairs are next to each other and people sit next to each other not across the table
-How carousels are everywhere and it's okay for adults to ride too :)
-The crepe a day rule and finding a crepe stand close to our hotel
-How the Eiffel Tower can just sneak up on you
-Kelly Crowe's guide to Paris

At the Louvre...
I discovered that I don't really "get" art. I will be purchasing Art History for Dummies when I get home.

I was hoping for a serene museum going experience. No such luck. At the _____ (insert famous work of art here), there were no less than 4,000 people and two school groups also vying for the same experience. My dream of sharing a quiet moment with the Mona Lisa was shattered, but at least I got to say hi.

You know how some things look bigger on TV? The Arc de Triomphe is not one of those things. It's breathtakingly beautiful. And enormous.

I think you will find your happiness there...

February 16, 2012

9.5 hours later and I'm finally here! I was fortunate enough to have 3 seats to myself, but still didn't sleep well. Go figure. I did, however, manage to almost miss dinner due to a Tylenol PM induced stupor. Too bad that stuff doesn't work longer than two hours. New life goal: To be able to sleep on an airplane.

Whoever said that the French aren't friendly is wrong. Right as we got off the plane, there was an airline agent greeting everyone with a friendly "Bonjour!" Fifty feet away there was also an armed guard so I guess friendly is relative.

Maureen and I are staying at the Woodstock Hostel in Montmarte. We spent the afternoon tooling around the neighborhood, visiting the shops, cafes (crepes...yum!), and visiting Moulin Rouge.

At Sacre Couer, there was a sign that read, "Welcome Messes," but the idea of a church welcoming the messes was nice. I think if you are one of the messes that needs welcoming, church is as good a place as any to be.

We were walking by a patisserie, admiring all the delectable pastries. Here is the exchange that took place.
Mo: I don't even know what those are, but they look delicious.
French man then points to the pastries, then puffs out his cheeks and puts his hands on his belly as if to inform us that those delicious treats will in fact make you fat.
Me: That was sort of the plan.

Once upon a time I did number two in one of those self-cleaning public toilets and it didn't flush. I told the woman in line behind me that it didn't flush, hoping that she wouldn't go in. But she did. You're welcome.

"I think you will find your happiness there." -The woman working the front desk at the hostel.
She was referring to a street with lots of restaurants after we asked her about dinner options, but I'd like to think it was a little more philosophical than that. ")

Is enroute a French word?

February 15, 2012

Paris has been on my travel bucket list for as long as I can remember. I can't believe I will actually be there in a few short hours! Yesterday, Cydne stopped by my office and on my introductory activity "homepage" from the beginning of the year, under "Place I'd Most Like to Visit" was written "Paris, France." She pointed it out and said, "You'll be able to cross this off tomorrow!" That paper had been posted on my wall for months and I hadn't even noticed that Paris was there waiting for me all along. It feels good to be traveling, to be putting a stamp on my passport. After Semester at Sea, I made a promise to myself to visit a new country each year. While I wasn't able to do that last year, I'm excited to make good on my promise for 2012. Looking forward to the next 6 days and being able to cross the City of Lights off my bucket list!